troubled mind

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Posts by troubled mind

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  5

  Do you like my new picture ?

  by troubled mind in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  a couple of days ago i posted my first picture which was of my incredibly cute dog ( cutest puppy in the world actually ).

  alas , that did not correctly portray my" toubled mind" moniker.

  now what you see is a storm coming in over the atlantic onto myrtle beach ,s.c. i took the picture a few years ago while on vacation there.

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  troubled mind

  Juni I really like your picture , who is it by?
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  7

  Is it time to come out ?

  by troubled mind in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i have been considering my options lately.

  i feel like i need to talk to my chilren about my true feelings about being , or in this case not being a jw any longer.

  my kids are all going to be home together, the first time in over two years, this next month .

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  troubled mind

  I have been considering my options lately. I feel like I need to talk to my chilren about my true feelings about Being , or in this case not being a JW any longer. My kids are all going to be home together, the first time in over two years, this next month . They know Dad and I are slacking off and kid us about being "pagan" for not going to meetings. Number two son has friends from our hall that I'm sure keep him informed. They also know we are allowing our youngest to make his own decisions about many things (piercing his lip, worldly GF,ect.) We however have never had a heart to heart about real reasons. I am trying to formulate exactly how I want to go about this ,and I think it may be best to stick to my personal feelings not so much on scandal or doctrine . Basically I am so tired of feeling not good enough for God. My whole life I have been anxious and fearful because of our religious teachings. I honestly want to feel loved by God , I want to believe we have a creator that cares about us. I can't stand the ill treatment people recieve at our hall the conditional way we are treated . I was saddend so much to see how my own children were treated over the years by back stabbing friends or how they personally saw how two faced many in the congregation were. I hate that all these years I have forced myself to go against my conscience to accept doctrines that men impose like the treatment of family that has been disfellowshipped . I can't stand myself for allowing others to influence my actions because of their judgemental attitudes. The constant feeling of guilt. We were truly loyal servants that taught our kids to respect the Elder arraingment (don't question them Jehovah directs them) .We accepted counsel given even when it was given without all the facts.Our down fall was allowing imperfect men shepard our faith in God ,which should be a personal relationship not a managed organizational outline. I feel much better over the past six months not reading any literatre or attending any meetings .The only thing that worries me now is how my children will treat me if I never return to witness life or if they will shun me for my personal feelings.
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  8

  The time has arrived, I need your support!

  by drew sagan in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  well guys it has finally come down to it.

  i think i am on my way out of the organization for good!

  last time i posted about my situation i wasn't sure what to do and was actually thinking about moving ahead in the organization for more confrontation which i hoped would help me get out.

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  troubled mind

  ((((Drew)))) I'm there with you buddy ! I am ready to make a stand soon too. Do you have any children still in ? That would be my biggest concern first as to prepare them. It sounds like your wife will be supportive of whatever you decide That has to be a huge relief for you . Good luck
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  5

  Do you like my new picture ?

  by troubled mind in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  a couple of days ago i posted my first picture which was of my incredibly cute dog ( cutest puppy in the world actually ).

  alas , that did not correctly portray my" toubled mind" moniker.

  now what you see is a storm coming in over the atlantic onto myrtle beach ,s.c. i took the picture a few years ago while on vacation there.

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  troubled mind

  A couple of days ago I posted my first picture which was of my incredibly cute dog ( cutest puppy in the world actually ). Alas , that did not correctly portray my" toubled mind" moniker. Now what you see is a storm coming in over the Atlantic onto Myrtle Beach ,S.C. I took the picture a few years ago while on vacation there. I think I like the original better , the one posted has been altered with a sunglow sepia effect . It is a good reflection of my mental state most of the time stormy, turbulant,irradic, passing by quickly, usually kicking up some debris in my wake. I really need a good therapist there is only so much you guys can do for me !
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  11

  Conversation with friend leads to despair

  by under_believer in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  my status is "fading but still sort of in.

  " i don't believe any of it anymore.. i just had a long conversation with a very old friend of mine who is "weak," as in he doesn't preach, and he doesn't make many of the meetings.

  he still believes everything, though... he's just "weak.

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  troubled mind

  I had a very similar experience lately. A very good friend that is still "in" yet her and her husband see the hypocritical nature of the elders and complain often. When I began to offer some critical thinking about the "truth " she became defensive. My son spends time with her husband and was one of the reasons my son began to doubt the truth because her husbands attitude against the elders. Now if I bring anything up they spout out the usual Witless support nonsense . I really can not understand them , the husband smokes cigars and over indulges in alcohol .They think it is okay to beleive what you want on personal matters like that, but major doctrines like blood and holidays you can't question. I told her that I would feel like a hypocrit if I went to meeting acting like I supported everything being said there when I don't. She doesn't see it that way. She thinks they can be part of the congregation and yet believe and act how they want.
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  28

  Good-bye, Sylvester

  by AudeSapere in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  today i must say good-bye to a friend i have known for 14 years.

  sylvester was only four months old when he and his brother scout moved in with me - a dog person - and my australian shephard.

  the kittens were supposed to be pets for the 10-year-old.

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  troubled mind

  I'm so sorry (((Denise)))) , I love my cat and dog dearly too. Your doing the right thing , as hard as it may be .
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  81

  Excommunication is good!!!!

  by I-follow-the-narrow-path in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  while talking to my teacher today we talked about excommunication.

  i told her i thought it was mean to not talk to those members which have been excommunicated.

  she told me; however, that those who leave the church should be punished.

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  troubled mind

  The advice to discuss this over with your father is very good . He has your best interest in veiw . Your father loves you with no hidden motive.Your Bible study teacher though well meaning has an agenda , which is to convert you . Oh they say that is not what they are doing, but believe me it most certainally is what they are doing. As for cutting yourself .....you evidently have stress issues ..have you sought medical , theraputic treatment ? A religion is not the magic answer to your problem . I personally know a very faithful Jehovah's Witness young lady that has this very same problem . It is not something her faith cures, like you she is stressed out (which by the way being a witness can and will add more stress ) Medical attention and counselling are what is needed . Jehovah's Witnesses do not offer nor are any of their Elders trained in such counsel.
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  4

  Monsoon season is here!

  by AK - Jeff in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  another 30 days or so and the we will have met the biblical flood requirements.. the great lakes region is not used to this much rain in may.

  i don't know the totals - but it just keeps on.

  what kind of wood do we need to build an ark?.

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  troubled mind

  Will this rain ever end ? Animals are beginning to pair up in my backyard ! Today I don't have to work until this afternoon...... I was hoping to do yard work this morning.....no such luck. Going back to bed sounds good though.
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  47

  Well, I got the dreaded call from the elder's tonight....

  by AK - Jeff in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i just returned from 18 holes of golf as the phone rang.. caller; hi jeff, this is bruce elder, how are you doing?.

  me; hello bruce.

  bruce; well [very nervous sounding voice now], i have kevin holierthanthou on the other line.

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  troubled mind

  Jeff.....((((((jeff))))) your letter was so honest and heartfelt. Your words reflect some of my very own thoughts perfectly. I can only hope this man that receives it will actually read it with an open mind (we can only wish). Do you feel like you have reached any sort of closure with them now ?
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  47

  How old were you when you were baptized?

  by moomanchu in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  .

  reading hellriders topic made me wonder about this.. i waited till i was 21 because i was drinking alcohol as a youth and didn't want to get baptized while breaking the law.

  man that is screwed up, seemed reasonable at the time.

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  troubled mind

  Seventeen I held out longer than most of my friends